I went to bed too late and woke up too early to call it morning.
Good Morning! (something I miss)
At this time, I’m talking. Talking with the noise in my head. Still vividly remembered in my memory. Familiarity, resemblance, fragrance, feelings, funny things, comfort, random conversations, Your hug, your touch, everything about you.
Is this a part of me?
Your accent,
Your tone of voice,
Your smile,
How you looked at me,
How you joked with me,
How we discussed matters of importance,
How you got angry,
All still clearly remembered. Even some things I imitate you unconsciously to this day. Is this what it means to become you? I feel like I’m hearing your name, everywhere I go. But maybe it’s just in my head. I still don’t understand why this feeling is so strong, even now. Even though I know it might not be right in the current situation.
There might be many biases and other perspectives at this time. If there’s a chance to serve a cup of tea together. Maybe it would explain and soothe.
I don’t know whether I should be happy or sad. I see many people being happy. But it turns out I don’t feel that happiness. I’m very sad. I’ve also never felt this heartbroken before.
I’m still imagining, still envisioning other scenarios. Still trying to understand what is called “universe support”. At what point will the universe support?
Do I need to elevate myself to meet you at the right time and under the right conditions?
This is just a small part of the noise in my head.
As I’ve said before. It will always live within me. This landing page, or as I prefer to call it, ‘Space’, is my way of making peace. My way to pour out the noise in my head. And maybe with this, what I said that you gonna live forever in me. You can also see it truly alive.
There will be more added and grown in this ‘space’.
If you remember, we once talked. About how I rarely express my feelings. This is my first piece of writing. It might not be perfect. Another promise. This writing will always be updated and added to.